I had a conversation lately with someone who longs for positive change and considers coaching with me. She prioritizes her family and coworkers whom she wants to be there for, in a myriad of ways, and feels it would be selfish to carve out time for coaching, to focus on herself, her wellbeing, her relationships, her work, and whatever needs a little TLC in her life.
This is something that comes up frequently in my conversations with enquiring women, so much so I feel compelled to share here in substance, what I told her.
Dear one,
Life is demanding and we all often feel that we owe more than we can give.
I understand that you want to be there for your loved ones, it’s a good way to love them.
You are not alone in fearing to be selfish if you ever carved out time dedicated only to yourself, your own growth, your own peace and your own happiness; many women feel that way.
But truth is, we owe ourselves as much as we are ready to give others.
We owe ourselves personal time and enquiry and discovery.
We owe ourselves unconditional love and care and generosity.
We are here, given this life to honor all the wondrousness of being alive and to enjoy it.
Cutting ourselves short when our deep seated desire for personal growth is clamoring for attention is not a fair choice.
It’s not fair to us.
It’s not fair to the person we can be.
Coaching can be a wonderful tool in exploring the deep entrenched beliefs that we are less worthy of our own time and attention than others are, and how that may affect everything, including our propension to spontaneous happiness, our intimate relationships, our choices, our limitations, and much more.
When we thrive we are an even greater gift to the world and the people we love and serve.
Never the other way around.
When we are constantly turned toward outside of us, helping, arranging, interfering, interacting, we forget about our own needs and growth and we can either burn out or become very controlling and chronically frustrated without even seeing it simply because we don’t allow for inner focus, reflective compassionate enquiry and gentle self-love.
Everything is about balance.
Love and Light
Emmeline
PS
We can not pour from an empty cup, therefore skipping on personal nurtering and growth is ultimately not the best choice, even for those around us.
The quality of our presence is to be considered, versus the quantity of it.
If this resonates strongly with you, drop me a note and I’ll make time for us to have an uncensored conversation about self-love, self-care and happiness in the context of your own life. My treat to you. No strings attached.
With love.